April 30, 2010

It's Okay Folks. She's Apologised.

No need for concern. Nothing to see. Move along.

Uber Twitterati Kerry McCarthy (pictured, with a word or two from her fans) has broken the law. She twittered postal vote details. The Electoral Commission says that this is a crime. The evidence of her wrongdoing is all over the interweb.

But, in true Zanu PF Labour style, all she has to do is apologise and it all goes away. It worked for Baroness Scotland, and it worked for Lord Ahmed, just as it worked for Harridan Harman.

Let us imagine that I shot my neighbour. In the face. With an Uzi.

(Ring ring)

Ranty: "Hello. Is that the police?"

Dibble: "Aye".

Ranty: "Just shot my neighbour. In the face. With an Uzi".

Dibble: "You bastard. We'll be right there".

Ranty: "Steady on mate. I'm sorry".

Dibble: "Oh! Well why didn't you say earlier? I pictured a day of reports, interviews, arrests, charges, meeting with the Procurator Fiscal, perhaps a little beating for you, and the inevitable press call. But now that you've apologised I can get on with my bacon sammitch. Mind how you go. Bye".


Ranty; "Morning boss. You know that confidential tender I have been working on for the last ten days? I sent it to all our competitors".

Boss: "What?!! Your ass is on the line here. I may fire you. Gross misconduct".

Ranty: "Hang on, hang on! I apologise".

Boss: "Cool. Talk to you later then, you rascal you."

This is what she had to say:

"In a statement released by Labour, Ms McCarthy said: "On hearing the results of a random and unscientific sample of postal votes, I posted them on Twitter. It was a thoughtless thing to do, and I very quickly realised that it was not appropriate to put such information in the public domain.

"Because this was not official information, and no votes had been counted, I thought of it as being akin to canvass returns, i.e. telling people how well we were doing with Labour promises on the doorstep, but I appreciate now it was wrong to do so. I have personally called the Returning Officer at Bristol City Council to apologise, and assured him I have removed the information as quickly as possible, within a matter of minutes. He has advised that it would not be lawful for anyone else to publish the information, for example, by re-posting my original Tweet."

EDIT:-Forgot to add the source

So that's alright then. She didn't break the law after all. She was just "thoughtless". See how she swiftly reminds everyone else that if they publish HER tweet it would be unlawful?

Fucking marvellous.

EDIT2: You can watch the movie here courtesy of Fido.

Fucking marvellous!



Unknown said...

Hmm. That would be one law for us and another law for them, then!

I would call them cunts, but cunts are useful...

The Last Of The Few said...

I posted her fuck up.

And I will happily go before the courts with that dull bint next to me no issues.

Indyanhat said...

Sung to the old xmas tune:

Tis the season to apologise,
LA LA La La La la labour lies

Call them bigots and apologise
LA LA La La la la labour lies.

Tis the season for mendation
Let us try to fix the ele-ec-tion.

LA LA La La La la labour Liiiiies..

Chuckles said...

'He has advised that it would not be lawful for anyone else to publish the information'

'Or for her to have posted it in the first place' would have been a useful phrase in there as well.

I believe the technical term for the post is 'A confession'

Bucko said...

Dibble? Heh heh.

So in your example, if I went and shot your dead guy in the face again with my uzi, that would be illegal?

Captain Ranty said...

Only if you didn't say sorry Bucko.

Go forth, and create chaos, but be sure to apologise afterwards and you'll be fine.


Antisthenes said...

"He has advised that it would not be lawful for anyone else to publish the information, for example, by re-posting my original Tweet."

I think what she is doing here is trying to get anyone with evidence against her in the form of a copy of her twit to destroy it. The threat being if you are caught with a copy you will have your neck felt to.

She should of course be charged and the vote should be declared void. She wont be charged and vote will not be declared void of course because she has apologised.

Fidothedog said...

So she fucks up, then claims that if anyone reports her fuck up its against the law.

Oh well video mockery ahoy.


Captain Ranty said...

Thank you Mr The Dog.

I just watched it. Excellent!!

(I have included your link to the clip).


Rog said...

She "reported herself" after she realised that bloggers were on it and weren't going to let her get away with it.

She had already been reported to the Electoral Services and the police.

Hope she gets disqualified and does time.

James Higham said...

Don't even start me on the Wicked Witch. I had a post ready to go but it nauseated me to see her name on site.

Captain Ranty said...

I had a choice of 22 images of the silly mare.

I picked the one that does her no favours.

Lock her up and throw the room away.

Harsh, some may say, but at the same time, fair.


hangemall said...

CR, I don't know why you have it in for her. Compared to some of them, she's only cataclysmically useless.

Captain Ranty said...

You misunderstand H, my disgust for all of them is total.

I want them all long ago and far away. They rob(bed) us, gave our country away, and expect us to vote for more of it?

Equally, they hate us as well. No normal human would do this to his fellows.

I used to think it was them and us. Just lately I realise it is just us. We are all in this together and that is why I don't understand their contempt.


Sir Henry Morgan said...

" "On hearing the results of a random and unscientific sample of postal votes ""

Er, hang on - I'm agent for 19 local authority candidates and three general election candidates. I also attend and remain at the potal vote opening every day - I hear nothing at all, and legally, I SHOULDN'T hear anything at all.

That she heard anything at all means someone else has broken the law by telling her.

Come on bitch - squeal. Who told you so the polis can nick 'em.

I can quote the necessary legislation if I have to -

Representation of the people Act 1983.

Section 66.

Para 2 (b)
Every person attending at the countingof the votes shall maintain and aid in maintaining the secrecy of voting and shall not-
(a) ...
(b) communicate any information obtained at the counting of the votes [all postal votes are counted as they are opened ... but not by party, only in total because no one is supposed to know which party gets how many votes - all votes are handled face down for this very purpose - Morg] as to the candidate for whom any vote is given on any particular ballot paper."

So, if she didn't break the law, someone else did by telling her. So c'mon bitch, squeal ... who did it? You MUST know.

Bloggers - spread that around.

Sir Henry Morgan said...

And she did break the law anyway - she broadcast it to the world.

Corruption in the Bristol elections personnel?

Sir Henry Morgan said...

This rule applies to:

Representation of the people Act 1983

Section 66 Para 1.

[This applies to ... Morg] :

1. (a) ...
(b)every candidate or election agent or polling agent so attending.

Broadcast her guilt far and wide.

dazmando said...

Added this to my 4th update on the orginal blog after I tweeted Kerry http://bracknellblog.blogspot.com/2010/04/bristol-east-are-opening-postal-votes.html cheers

subrosa said...

In my ignorance I thought postal votes were only opened after the polling stations closed.

No wonder it's wide open to fraud.

Unknown said...

Anyone in a position to make a private prosecution?

That would really be fighting back rather than just sitting on the slidelines and whining. I'm ready to make a contribution.

Captain Ranty said...

I'm ready to chip in as well.


Unknown said...


So, how about using your great powers of blogging to find someone ready to do so?

Captain Ranty said...


This is a tiny blogspot. I get around 300 hits a day. This does not put me in the "great" bracket. Old Holborn, or perhaps Guido, would be better positioned.

However, I am ready to support whenever required.