January 21, 2010

A Message from Cameron

In an unguarded moment, Davey boy reveals the true manifesto.

Unlike Labour, you can rely on the Tories to honour their promises.

The next five years are going to be ugly.

Very ugly indeed.


Uncle Marvo said...

... whoever gets in.

And we know who's getting in, don't we?

Although it is at least one in the remaining eye for the ones who fucked it up more than anyone in living history.

Small consolation.

Captain Ranty said...

It's a done deal.

The Tories now get their chance to fuck us up some more. Turn and turnabout-it's the way we do things.

It will be most excellent to see the Gorgon on the scrapheap at last. I am not a vengeful man but no-one deserves eternal obscurity more.

I had a butchers at your new blog. You may (or may not) be pleased to learn that I added you to the list of Awkward Sods in less than a heartbeat.


watching said...

Naa naa beat you to it!

Mind you have been away in a smoky drinky place called Germany which is also an EU region so is callmedave going to roll back the smoking ban here to make us better europeans?

Stranger things have happened!

Captain Ranty said...

Fairy nuff.

You beat me by two days! Oh, the shame!

Still, great minds think alike, I spose.

If CMD has any plans to unban the smokers, he is keeping bloody quiet about it.

Hope springs eternal....


Uncle Marvo said...

I hope he doesn't.

I think that's one of the strongest driving forces for change. If he rescinds the ban he will:

a) upset a lot of cunts who said they'd drink in pubs, and
b) get us bastard filthy smokers back in the bar, all happy and contented.


Uncle Marvo said...

Thanks for calling me an Awkward Sod.

I would reciprocate, but it seems that, despite my supposedly doing this sort of shit for a living, I am inept and can't even make it look better than something my kids knocked up, let alone put that widget on there.

If you've got any tips, please mail me!

Dominic Allkins said...

I had a go at a couple of these myself:

Air brushed Dave

and a bit/lot more vicious given the Tories new criminal justice policy:

Big Brother is watching

Unknown said...

David Cameron was against the smoking ban when it came in in 2007 but, only one year later, he did a U turn saying:

"We lost the argument and we've moved on. We are all better off because we are not smoking.

"But for a lot of people it's a big change, because going to the pub for a pint and a fag was part of life.

"I don't like bans. I don't like the hunting ban, I don't like smacking bans and I don't like smoking bans. But I think the country has moved on."

Cameron is an ex-smoker! Never would have guessed.


Captain Ranty said...

Thanks for the reminder TBY.

Oi! Dave!,

I used to think you were alright. But I have moved on. I don't like you, I don't like your party, I don't like your plans for my country. I have moved on.

Not very nice, is it?



Dick Puddlecote said...

I hear from Tories that they might do something, perhaps, maybe, but can't tell us what it might be. As I've said before, it's like one big electoral lucky dip.

And that's what they want us to vote for instead of Labour. Sheesh, what a choice!

Captain Ranty said...


I think the Libertarian wing are in favour of reform, but CMD and his 1st Eleven are more like Labour than Labour.

The boy needs to learn to listen. Then we may have some sort of future.