February 02, 2010

Roll Up! Roll Up!

Get yer DNA fucked here!

Give up yer privacy! Show yer parts to some freak in a cupboard!

Get yer tits on YouTube! Paedos need new images of yer kids!


This new fangled device couldn't find a bomb under your clothes even if you pointed at it. Don't let that stop you, drones. Jump straight in there!

The famous, the royal, the rich, the powerful, and the sensible will not be going into this magic box.

So why the fuck should you?

Just. Say. No.



Anonymous said...



Anonymous said...


It is easy. It's perfectly simple. It's really not rocket science....

In a similar vein, to the "Duvet Revolution Concept" recently brought to your attention....

"In you go sir."


"But you have to. Or you cannot board your flight."

"OK then. Fuck the flight. I'll go home."

I'm up for it. How long would BAA or Easyjet put up with no one booking holidays in protest. It's easy. You only have to make a start...

If only trying to convince the numpties wasn't like trying to clap with one hand....

Tickets are booked. JB is returning soon to join the fight. Can't wait to start saying "No." Sounds like great fun!

Enjoy the blog no end CR. Recommend you to all I cross paths with now.

See you soon, one and all.


Captain Ranty said...

Anon, (19:15),

Thanks for the tip.

I posted a write up. (Although my title doesn't exactly trip off the tongue).


Captain Ranty said...


This shit only involves flights to the USA does it not?

If so they can do without the pleasure of my company, or my tourist (or business) dollars.

Someone, somewhere, at some point, will surely wise up.

This should cost the American Tourist Industry a pretty penny. And this is a time when they need people to come and spend money.

It ticks all the boxes, dunnit?

1. Invasive
2. Useless
3. Expensive

When will they learn?

Good luck with the "NO" campaign. If you don't have fun with it, you are doing it wrong! Pop back here for a refresher...:)


Anonymous said...


Only the US? I'm not sure, don't quote me but....

Our local airport was the testbed for this shit in Canada, before rolling it out for about $10m or some ridiculous amount of cash, at a time when schools out here are running out of cash and closing.... genius..... where was I....

.... oh, yeah, the airport, yeah, we've got the test system. And when I sent the mutha in law packing the last couple of times back to the motherland, she was encouraged to go through. Fortunately I had done a good job reprogramming her and she told them to "get stuffed"....

.... so, no I don't think it's just the US, but as I said, don't quote me on that. It would be good to know, should I need to get back to the land of the mounties, bears and moose....


Captain Ranty said...


I could easily be wrong, but my reading of it was that only flights TO the USA were affected, at this time. No doubt it will be a case of monkey see, monkey do for the rest of the world.

For interest, in Libya International airport they have the old fashioned things, you know, those little arches. I routinely walk through them carrying more metal than C3PO is made of. I just smile sheepishly, and say "Phone", and the security wallahs just nod, smile back, and wave me through.

In Lagos (at the domestic airport) I was catching a flight to Abuja, and I watched a soldier put his AK-47 through the x-ray machine. I asked the operator (in a sincere voice) "What are you looking for?". His face remained impassive as he said, just as sincerely, "Guns".

I almost soiled myself.