July 11, 2011

BZZZZZZT!! Take That Old Man!

Who will they zap next?

Newborns? Those in wheelchairs? People on life support?

Our sick coppers are at it again. This time they made an 82 year old man dance at the end of their new toy.


"An 82-year-old pensioner required hospital treatment after being tasered by police, a watchdog has said.

The elderly man was being arrested for carrying an offensive weapon and criminal damage when officers fired the electroshock weapon at him."

The old fella was taken to hospital from where he was later discharged. The full story can be found here.

To the nameless pensioner: I hope you get well soon.

To the spineless copper who tasered him: I hope your next shit is a hedgehog dipped in napalm.

Yes, yes, I know we don't have all the facts, but an 82 year old man is not a threat to anyone. Least of all to strapping 6 foot bobbies. Following the enquiry I am betting that the conclusion will be that the cop had around 9 other options he could have tried absolutely no other options as the old guy was about to kill everyone in sight with his bare hands. Twice.



F***W*T TW****R said...

These fuckwits are dangerous with anything other than a blancmange. Hell, they even kill each other when they're training. I'm sure we recruit the fuckers from the U.S.A. Cowboys

Akvavitix said...

I will bet you that this appears ass one of those sanctimonious retorts by some Whitehall official about "Lessons learned". Normally making me lunge at my TV set.

When the crowds pickup pitchforks I don't think there will be much love lost between Plod the Enforcer and the general public.

Captain Ranty said...

I'd like to know what the "offensive weapon" was.

His walking stick?

His steely glare?

His pipe?

Yes. Lesson will be learned. Just not by the uniformed thugs.


Anonymous said...

I'll be very surprised if the "investigation" results in anything other than a verdict of "use of a taser was proportionate and appropriate". How fucking ridiculous.

Time to break out the Thorshield.

Oh, what a minute, only coppers and stormtroopers can buy them. Y'know, cos it's meant for the protection of law enforcement against us taser-wielding masses.

Funny that.

What a wonderful world.



Harry Hook said...

"Least of all to strapping 6 foot bobbies"

Surely, you mean... obese, 4 foot 11 inch bobbies?

Captain Ranty said...

Fuxake Harry,

Surely you jest?

They wouldn't send in the short-arses to apprehend an 82 year old!

They send the big burly bastards.

No point taking chances...


Captain Ranty said...


Do you think their video was aimed at those dangerous OAP's?

I think so. I really do.

It gets more difficult by the day to like and respect the bobbies. They do themselves no favours. (Mind you, I suspect that they don't give a fuck).


Harry Hook said...

Cap'n... you're absolutely right... I apologise.

wayne said...

F****** Cowards.

Anonymous said...

Captain, when you have gangs like this one roaming around, law enforcement needs all the protection it can get.


Perhaps the officers involved in this case had seen that before they went out, and thought it was a public information film....

In all seriousness, it's rather scary that the Thorshield video essentially seems to refer to all aspects of law enforcement as "urban peacekeeping" and those involved being "on the front lines of modern warfare" (said whilst the video shows, um, an unarmed civilian forced out of their car at taserpoint), with the Thorshield as "the active counter-measure that brings the advantage back to the war fighter".

Highly illustrative, methinks.



Captain Ranty said...


Years ago, when they were only armed with a truncheon, bravery was a given. Now they are handing out these non-lethals to all and sundry. No bravery required, see? They just point and press. Their mates higher up will take care of them.

That video was disturbing. I felt like the enemy after watching it. I didn't before.


PS- loved the Granny sketch!

Angry Exile said...

The article's pretty short on detail at the moment. I'm particularly interested to know if they actually fired the taser at him as suggested or if they used it in what I've come to think of as the cattle prod mode. I feel shooting the darts across a space and into someone's body is more likely to be a considered action on the part of a cop using a taser, though of course it can still be abused, but have some real concerns about the continued electrocution of someone after they've been hit with the darts and even more about the cattle prod style 'zap 'em 'til they do as they're told' incidents we're seeing just about everywhere that tasers are used. As I said, it'll be interesting to see which category this case falls into.

vervet said...

"They do themselves no favours. (Mind you, I suspect that they don't give a fuck)."

One quick visit to the website of that 'Inspector Gadget' tosser would confirm your suspicions CR.

The comment: "First ?" is the most witty, incisive and constructive comment most of them can manage.

Anonymous said...

Police have been given the go-ahead to use
Taser stun guns against children.
The relaxing of restrictions on the use of the weapons comes despite warnings that they could trigger a heart attack in youngsters. The body count in North American now stands at over 287 after having been tasered with this "less than lethal" device. 15 Canadians and over 272 Americans since 2001.

Daily Mail

Lavender Luck said...

In America, when the Red Sox won, there was a spontaneous celebration in the street in Boston. Not a riot. Peaceful and cheerful. They rushed to run out to the field to celebrate and the police began randomly sniping into the crowd (non-lethal, whatever), and shot to death a 19 yr old girl.Worst of all, it was hardly a big deal. No one was outraged.The police are now trained to be cowards.

Captain Ranty said...


That always mystifies me.

That these (alleged) grown men and women are so infantile. On any other forum it would be annoying but these fuckwits are a cross section of 43 police forces FFS.


Captain Ranty said...


You are right. We need more detail.

We'll have to wait for the IPCC investigation to conclude.


Captain Ranty said...


Why does that not surprise me?

They already have blood on their hands with over 100 in-custody deaths a year. What's a little more?

Thanks for the link.


Captain Ranty said...


Maybe we have become numb. When the death of a 19 year old girl at a ball game shocks no-one except the parents it's a sad, sad state of affairs.

I reckon that electing police chiefs may help. As long as we make them accountable for the actions of their officers.


George said...

I think it is about time the public armed themselves with paint-ball guns and paint-ball armour.

Paint-balls can be filled with the stuff that is used to make "stink-bombs" and is non-lethal.

The rights of the police are supposed to be the same as that of the citizen. If body armour and masks are OK for the police then the same is OK for Joe public.

Captain Ranty said...


I see no reason why not.

Was it not Sir Bobby Peel who said "Constables are merely citizens in uniform"?


Angry Exile said...

I thought it was something about cunts in uniform. Maybe I misheard.